


what he wants

by orphan_account



Series: Sadurday [4]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Casual Sex, Friends With Benefits, Hurt Peter Parker, M/M, Miscommunication, No Smut, Oblivious Tony Stark, Poor Peter Parker, Sad Ending, Sad Peter Parker, Self-Esteem Issues, Unhealthy Relationships, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-13
Updated: 2020-06-13
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:40:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24696178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Peter wants more than what he has with Tony, but he doesn't want to ruin the way things are.
Relationships: Peter Parker/Tony Stark
Series: Sadurday [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1757065
Comments: 4
Kudos: 33





	what he wants

**Author's Note:**

> poor petey :<

Peter feels empty without Tony’s touch.

The older man rarely indulges Peter’s need for affection, but Peter keeps crawling back like an idiot. He just can’t help himself.

Tony is like a God among men. He’s smart and sexy and sarcastic and everything about him turns Peter on. 

Tony said, in the beginning of their relationship, that it was just casual sex. While that would sound like a good deal to most people, Peter found himself uncomfortable with the idea. His feelings for Tony go deeper than just friends with benefits. But Tony made it explicitly clear that there would be no feelings involved and Peter - figuring that this was the only way to get close to Tony - agreed despite his reservations.

Tony isn’t a bad man, Peter thinks, he just knows what he wants. And he doesn’t want a relationship with a dorky, annoying kid. It’s reasonable. If a little painful.

Peter’s sitting on the shower floor. The lukewarm spray of the water is unsatisfying, but tolerable. He’s just passively sitting there, hoping for things to get better. Maybe one day they will, but it seems unlikely.

He sighs. He wonders if there’s a world in which he and Tony end up together. Where they’re a happily married couple who live together and call each other cute pet names. Where Peter doesn’t feel like a sex toy made solely for Tony’s pleasure.

It’s not like Tony knows that this hurts Peter. That the afterglow of sex just isn’t worth the pain Peter feels when he returns home.

Peter won’t ever tell him either. It would break the no feelings rule. It could, and probably would, ruin everything. And, as much as it hurts Peter, he can’t bring himself to leave Tony.

It feels too good when Tony calls him sweetheart - even if it’s just in the heat of the moment. And it feels even better when Tony holds Peter close to his chest and they stay like that for a brief moment, just taking in each other's presence. 

It feels too good to give up. 

But it hurts too much to continue.

Maybe one day Peter will become brave enough to say his feelings aloud. But, for now, he must be content to silently trace the older man’s body in bed, wishing for more than the man is willing to give. 


End file.
